the word of the day is blah

it's also the feeling of the year...

have a nice day

ya know what annoys me?  when a company tells you to email them 3 times you are available for a phone interview...and then they don't freakin' call you.  as you can guess, i have wasted about 3 days waiting on that damn call.  AHHHHHHHHH!!!  oh, and the job market sux right now...but i'm sure that's already obvious.

i should have just double majored EE with CS...i was so good at CS.  loved to program in java, i got freakin A in the class and almost had my ex-gf become my ex a little sooner cuz i spent so much of my damn time trying to do well in that class.  shoulda learned C/C++ too.  I would definitely have had a job then.  oh well, no turning back now.  but still...ya know?

i should have also just applied for that job teaching english in japan, but i wouldn't have been able to live with myself if my grandfather had died while i was overseas and i didn't get to attend his funeral.  it would have been a great exp...i guess it's still not too late.

and what's with food network changing the times they show iron chef.  that show is the only reason food network even exists to me.  used to watch that stuff when it first debuted in the states.  that's the first time i found out that "fois gras" is actually goose liver pate and sakai (iron chef french) always uses it in some dish he prepares...no matter what.

so what's the dilly yo yo with all of this?  if you have any clues, fill me in.  till next time.

so it's time to get deep and personal...again...so get a cold drink, a snack, and take a seat cuz here we go and there is no stopping....well....unless of course you get up and go do something else...THEN we would stop, no doubt...but you know that you would be back...you know it so you might as well just stick around and finish up...

i'd like to share some of my thoughts about my perceptions of life now that i'm out of school.

in my 5 years (oh my god!!!  5 years...i must be some kind of slacker or som...) of college i've been witness to a host of life changing events that most ppl prolly go through.  i've lost 2 grandparents, a family pet, a shizload of money, and my youth.  i was lucky enough to fall in love, but stupid enough to lose it.  i made some new friends, but lost some old ones.  i've stepped on a few toes, but i would do anything for those i care about.

i've realized that life is a constant series of moments:  most are bad, but that makes us appreciate the good ones.  things never come easy to ppl:  it's always a constant struggle and then you die.  maybe that's not the best outlook, but wouldn't you agree that it's accurate?

so the next thing that would obviously follow suit is religion.  i myself lost my faith long ago...too many things have happened to me and have happened in this world for me to believe that there is a merciful god or deity or whatever you believe in.  i'm not saying that ppl who believe in religion are fools or anything...in fact, i envy their ability to take that blind leap of faith.  but i just can't do it now...time is not right i suppose.  unfortunately, that actually leaves me feeling a bit lonely sometimes...like there is no greater being watching over me and ready to fill me in on all my questions.  but it's also good cuz that means when i'm taking a shower then there aren't any spiritual spying eyes...not like they would mind getting the free show and all, ya dig???  ;-D  i guess what i'm trying to say is that i am a person who needs more than just blind faith to follow something.  my mind is too damn analytical for that.  but maybe things will change in time...ya think?

i've also realized that i'm a loner.  it's just the way i am.  i mean sometimes i'm not like that by choice, but mostly i am. 

oh...and i'm a rather private person too (can you believe that pat...patrick tanna, folks...thinks i am more of a mystery man than him?  go figure) so i'm going to have to stop telling stuff now.

and for pat:  "why don't you just take the meat bridge?"..."it's right here."

jyaa mata, nizzas!!!

here are some results of online tests i took earlier...damn was i bored...

Emode's Original Inkblot Test   Jonathan, your unconscious mind is driven most by Imagination This means you have a deep desire to use innovative ideas to enhance your life and influence the world around you. This drive influences you far more than you may realize on a conscious level. Your need to be innovative drives how you look at new opportunities and the kinds of experiences in life you choose to have. On an unconscious level, the reason you may be so driven by imagination is your fear of destruction, the opposite of creation. When you are unable to create due to restrictions imposed by your environment or even ones you unwittingly impose on yourself, do you feel trapped or confined? You may find these feelings of unease only get better when you find another outlet for your imagination. With such a strong creative orientation, you are willing to entertain a broad spectrum of ideas at any given time. The world is a fuller, richer place because you can contribute new ideas to any experience. Your natural curiosity inspires those around you and encourages them to come up with ideas they wouldn't have thought of without your help. Though your unconscious mind is driven most strongly by Imagination, there is much more to who you are at your core. What Kind of Kisser Are You?   Jonathan, you're a Passionate Kisser That's right, you've got all the moves. There's something about your approach to kissing that's natural, smooth, and ultimately, very charming. You know that to lure your mate you need to play the part — from knowing all the moves to looking pulled together — whatever that means for you. What Kind of Sexy Are You?   Jonathan, you're Sweet 'n' Sexy You're not overt about your sexuality, but you're not purposely hiding it either — two traits that naturally draw people to you. You possess an understated zest for life, and a way of approaching the day with a can-do attitude that draws people to you. As a teenager, were you maybe a little on the quiet side? Even if you weren't, it's clear that underneath your occasionally understated statements, you have an undeniable sweetness that attracts people who see that special something burning from within.

What's Your Flavor?   Mmm ... vanilla! Clean, fresh, and classic, you're the flavor of ice cream on hot summer nights and cookies dipped in hot cocoa. In a word, you're comforting — a steady, faithful person who's a rock in times of trouble and always has a shoulder for friends to cry on. Don't underestimate your importance; everyone needs someone they can count on. Flashy? Not you. Overwhelming? Never. You're reassuring and friendly, the ultimate warm blanket people love to snuggle up with. Simple, soothing, and good with everything from fresh berries to chocolate sauce, you're a truly tasty treat.

What's Your True Color?   Jonathan, your true color is Black! Your color is black. The color of night. Serene and mysterious, black conjures up images of elegant evening gowns, dashing tuxedos, and gleaming limousines. Traditionally a symbol of success, black also represents power and an uncompromising demand for perfection.

What's Your Perfect Car?   Jonathan, you're a Sports Car! Our global positioning device has got you pinpointed somewhere between glamorous and racy. You're the fast, flashy Sports Car. We're thinking a BMW or even a Porsche Boxster, with a luminous silver paint job. You are the prize earned after years of hard work and strife.

What Breed of Dog Are You?   Jonathan, you're a Bernese Mountain Dog! No bones about it, you're a good-hearted, people-loving Bernese Mountain Dog. Down-to-earth and loyal, no one works or plays harder than you do. You put your nose to the grindstone when it really counts, but you never neglect your social calendar.

Which "Friend" Are You?   Jonathan, you've got a little bit of Chandler going on! Could you be any more like Chandler? The most lovable wiseguy around, you've got more than a little Bing inside you, don't 'cha? Front and center in your Chandler-ness is that unstoppable wit, keeping everyone in stitches (or at least deflecting uncomfortable situations).

What Kind of Monkey Are You?   Jonathan, you're a Chimpanzee. That's right, chimps are the Einsteins of the primate world (so long as you're not counting that species known as human). That's why you might find that you're known as the tinkerer and the "smarty pants" amongst your friends and co-workers. Like most chimpanzees, you're probably an excellent problem-solver and can often find an answer for any conundrum that presents itself — whether you're trying to escape from your cage, making new tools out of twigs, or figuring out how to lure that cute chimp from the next tree over with your charm and affections.

What's Your Theme Song?     Jonathan, your theme song is Back in Black! You're a hard-core guy who knows what he wants and intends to get it. That's why your theme song is "Back in Black." Whether you're pumping iron, shooting pick-up hoops, or rounding up the boys for a night of havoc, AC/DC's metal classic is the perfect tune to get you fired up and blow your speakers out in the process.

What's Your Superpower?
Stop the clock! Your inner superpower is TIMETRAVEL! Your answers show a keen sense of insight for all the mysteries of time. Whether you enjoy reminiscing about thepast or find yourself lost in thoughts of the future, your energies definitely point away from the present. Maybe you're mere seconds ahead or behind the rest of us, but you could also be days or even years out of sync. Your unique position in time and space gives you a wider perspective on daily events and makes you an especially wise person. You're probably a great planner. And since time is yours to play with, it's almost a given that you manage it well. If you haven't yet taken a trip through the fourth dimension, you're in for the ride of your life. Don't delay! Visit the future. Fix the past. And when you come across a very special moment, make it last as long as you like.

What's Your Monster Match?   Jonathan, there's a Mummy lurking inside of you! You've been dead for 3000 years, but you are still the life of the party because your monster match is the mummy. Has anyone ever told you that you look sharp in linen, and white is definitely your color?

so that's me in a nutshell according to www.emode.com

i hope you enjoyed all of that...actually, i don't really care if you did or not, but it would be nice if you did.

lata!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

this is the new year's edition of jonathan's xanga posting.  there will be more text than usual...probably be special guest appearances, a musical number, zanny animal tricks and much much more.  so without further adeau i give you...dere-lict...

so i woke up around 4:30pm today from the new year's party last night.  you can guess how much fun it was.

to my friends (let's alphabetize this one):

Achal:  i'm glad i got to know you this semester.  you a good friend.  your pad is like my second or third home away from home.  i can only hope to be half the smooth playa you are .  i'll try to hang out with you more this semester, if you have the time that is.

Chirag:  what can i say?  you is my nig.  augusta visit was made more fun cuz of you and pat and your attitude is fantastic (chi "hey pat, let's hook jonathan up with <insert some hot girl's name here>").  you are hella fun to hang out with, not to mention drink with, hehe.  thnx buddy.

Chung:  well it was good of you to come and spend new year's with us.  sorry we didn't get along as roommmates too well, but that happens.  i hope to see you more this year than last.  good luck with gatech and your jobbie job.

Dave Lee:  i've known you even before gatech.  you made it all the more fun.  i'm glad you were around to usher in the new year with me.  sorry i slept so damn much this break, but i was tired   you have to come to atl more often or maybe i'll just go up to bean town to visit ya.

Eric "Cheuk":  i will always remember "who stole my graduation present?" for the rest of my life.  i didn't get to know you all that well over the summer cuz of ece 4430 and 4000, but fall remedied that.  i hope you have fun over in HK and keep in touch with everyone.  and btw, could you bring me back a hottie lil' hongkie girl when you come to visit?  thnx. 

Jay:  i don't know you that well, but i'm glad i met you.  i bet you didn't plan on being a hamster breeder...but that's the way it goes.  too bad you didn't celebrate the new year with us, but you had other plans and that's coo.

Jimmy:  buddy...i can't believe you came out with us.  wow!  hehe, i'm sorry for being so shocked but...wow!  anyway, i'm glad you were there.  it was nice to spend new year's with you, brings back some memories of augusta, huh? 

Julie Chang:  i'm glad that you and pat found each other.  you definitely fun to hang out with.  it was good to meet you this semester.  it was great that you were at the new year's bash.  i hope the best for you and pat.  and yes...i'm ghetto and a thuggy thug

Kev:  hehe, you can't be summed up in words.  i'm glad that you are one my best friends.  i dunno if i would have turned out the way i am if it wasn't for meeting you.  maybe that's my own version of predestination, huh?  you are almost at the end of your gatech sentence, just 4 more months or so.  i will always remember us in calc 3 class with robinson and you falling asleep almost every class...and then the snoring, hehe.  be well and i'm sure i'll see you a lot more this semester (seeing as we are roommmates and everything ).  i'm glad you were there for new year's, wouldn't have been great without ya.

Kimiko:  i'm glad i got to know you during fall.  keep working at getting to gatech, i know you'll get in for sure.  however, you need to learn your way around campus a little better.  and when do i get to see comet???

Marc S. (or A., which ever you are this week, hehe):  well, it was good to have you at the celebration.  i guess you were just getting quietly drunk or something cuz i didn't really see you around.  i hope my job will be more interesting than your's cuz you seem to hate it...hehe.  i hope it brought back some fond augusta memories (fond, maybe another word could be used, eh?).  i'll be seeing you again soon, i'm sure.

Patrick "Phattrax":  yoO!  dude, i'm glad i met you and became really good friends with you.  design class was possibly the worst class i've ever had at gatech, but you made it tolerable.  having you and chi down to augusta was "off tha hook."  it wouldn't have been new year's without ya.  i'm glad you found someone is this chaotic world.  i can't believe you think i'm more mysterious than you.  good luck with everything, and i'm sure we'll be "chillaxin (TM)" quite a bit this semester.

Ping:  3 yrs...that's quite a while, huh?  i wish you coulda been there for new year's, but i guess i'll just have to get over it, huh?  i hope med school is what you want and i hope you do well in everything you do.  you should come to atl more, but maybe you shouldn't drive...hehe.

Shruti:  good to meet you.  i can't believe we never met each other before seeing as we lived in the same neighborhood, rode the same bus and went to the same middle school and high school.  oh well, go figure.  new year's would not have been nearly as fantastic if you weren't there.  just do something for me...learn your limit and you know what i'm talking about.  just kidding . 

Sonali:  well, i just met you but you are loads of fun to talk to whether i'm drunk or not, hehe.  your boy is fun to hang out with too.  i can't believe you've never seen "austin powers 3".  we'll just have to do something about that.

Tanveer:  i didn't forget you...REALLY!  i'm glad that i met you.  you are a great person and fun to hang out with.  remember the time we saved the world from those space mutants who wanted to enslave mankind?  that was something else huh?  well good luck with school and remember that you aren't alone.

Thee "T-squared":  we had some fun this semester, right?  i wish i were half the badass you are...i mean, you have to just beat the ladies off with a stick.  now that is charisma.  have fun finishing off gatech.

Tina:  i'm glad that i met you this fall.  you are fun to hang out with and your sense of sarcasm could never be imitated.  taiwan sounds hella fun...wish i could go.  but anyways, i think you have an amazing voice, no matter what anyone else thinks.  have fun and good luck with school.

i believe that should cover just about everyone.  if i left you out of this line-up don't be mad at me cuz i'm going blind from staring at the computer screen and i want to go ahead and get this up on my page.  just let me know if you aren't on here and i will include you post haste.

i just wanted to tell all you guys that i meant it when i said that this new year's was the best i've ever had...ever. 

it seems that 2002 was a year of losing things precious to us and it was a time of great change for some of us.  i hope that 2003 will be better for all.

to everyone on this list, i just thought i'd let you guys know how i felt. 

to everyone i know...thnx for making 2002 unforgettable and making 2003 seem that much brighter.  i hope i will be able to spend more time with all of you.  til next time...bye!!!